One blazing hot day I said to my dad “Can I play football?” He
replied “yes!” So I went out to play. After a while, I went back in, I strolled
to the kitchen and when I slowly opened the cupboard door BANG! It was a portal to
chocolate land! I was amazed! There was chocolate everywhere but how did I get
here? I could see the gooey, scrumptious chocolaty hearts, I also saw the
amazing tasty cars. I couldn’t believe my eyes! There was mouth-watering chocolate
buildings! But I had to go back my house. That was a fantastic hot day!
Emad, this reminded me of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe visiting Willie Wonka's chocolate factory! Some good use of language "I couldn't believe my eyes!" Certainly a mouth-watering short story. Well done. Mrs. Weeks
ReplyDeleteHi Emad, well done on this story, I would really like to visit chocolate land! What I liked most about your story was the description like 'blazing hot' and 'gooey, scrumptious' it really made your writing come alive. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteJacqui (Team 100)
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDelete