One
day I, Elizabeth beckany, decided to face my fear of heights. But not
everything would go according to plan...
I
was 26 years old and had nothing. Then I got lucky. I went on a game show and won
a skydiving trip. 3,000 meters above the ground and an hour long flight up
there. As soon as I got home I realized there was one problem. I couldn’t go. I
would just make a fool of myself, in the end I was forced into it and before I
knew it I was on the fearful flight. And trembling, I leaped off the plane and
looking down, I was surprised to see a spectacular view of the grass glittering
in the fields and forests. It wasn’t that bad! But then the worst thing
possible happened. I realized I was carrying an unopened package instead of a
parachute. I lived a good life...
Another amazing piece of writing Millie, you have really thought about your ending right from the beginning. You have a particular 100 WC writing style and I'd encourage anyone to read your past entries.
ReplyDeleteMillie I cant believe you used the riddle any way its quite good I liked I lived a good life part from Millie w
ReplyDeleteWhat a powerful piece of writing, Millie. I loved the fact that you cast yourself as a 26 year old so confidently. Your writing has a lovely rhythm, and you keep your readers guessing all the way to the end. At first I thought it would be a sad story; then I thought everything was going to end well; but then your disaster struck!
ReplyDeleteRe-read these 2 sentences: "I went on a game show and won a skydiving trip. 3,000 meters above the ground and an hour long flight up there." Could you have joined the two sentences together using a different piece of punctuation? Would that have made the writing clearer?