One pitch black night I was strolling through the deep dark
wood. I could hear someone saying” come and get it” .I was getting scared. All
my life people called me a wimp but today I’m not a wimp. I could see a black shadow, I started to panic
I called the police, but it was no use there was no phone service. At the end
of the deep dark wood there was a rotten, derelict, old house. So I had to
check it out. The door creaked as I gently pushed it open ,the wooden floor
scraped I STARTED TO PANIC...
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Well done Mason an excellent part of the story. Great use of adjectives and I like your use of capitals at the end to emphasis how scared you are. You could improve by making your speech punctuation correct.
ReplyDeleteHi Mason,
ReplyDeleteWhat a chilling story! Your font made my blood run cold!!
I love the way that you have used a variety of adjectives to keep the reader interested.
Your picture looks scary too!
Keep up the good work!
Mr Kilcoyne
Team 100wc
London
UK
One pitch black night I was strolling through the deep dark wood. I could hear someone saying” come and get it” .I was getting scared. All my life people called me a wimp but today I’m not a wimp. I could see a black shadow, I started to panic I called the police, but it was no use there was no phone service. At the end of the deep dark wood there was a rotten, derelict, old house. So I had to check it out. The door creaked as I gently pushed it open ,the wooden floor scraped I STARTED TO PANIC...
ReplyDeletecool picture mason i like the story mabe add some more adjectives to make it better from kelly and jessica
ReplyDeletei like the adjectevs you use and your punchuatoin, but you dont need that many commas
ReplyDeletelike your picture well done from Jamie and harry
ReplyDelete