Move! Move! Get out
of here,hes comeing.”I will come you will not see me,you will die”
“Im sorry, no-one is
to enter the woods there is a cerial killer in there and he isn’t afraid.”
“are you shure these
people are not comiting sucide?”
“Look riping youre
own guts out is vertuly impossible.”
Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
“everyone stand back...”
“O.M.G”
“oh my god,a dead body”
“can it be”
“Close youre eyes
kids”
“Mummy hes asleep
isn’t he? Mummy”
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Love your drawing Millie, and a very scary story. Couple of points for the future, it would be helpful to know which characters are speaking and you need to make sure your apostrophes are correct. he's / you're
ReplyDeleteGosh, this was quite a scary story, Millie! I can tell that you really thought about the prompt. I’d have liked to have known who was speaking, too. If you were writing a graphic novel, you would be able to use speech bubbles, but without the drawings, it’s hard to tell.
ReplyDeleteKeep on with the writing, Millie!
Mrs Ower (Team 100WC)
Costa del Sol, Spain
millie.w your spelling went wrong comeing is coming but oter than that well done
ReplyDeletefrom Tanya
HI Millie I saw your work was kind of confusing with your speech and that but your spellings are also wrong other than that great
ReplyDeletefrom jafna
Move! Move! Get out of here,hes comeing.”I will come you will not see me,you will die” chanted an echoing voice from in front
ReplyDelete“Im sorry, no-one is to enter the woods there is a cerial killer in there and he isn’t afraid.”the police man shouted feeling impreased with himself.
“are you shure these people are not comiting sucide?” I said
“Look riping youre own guts out is vertuly impossible.” the police man wispered looking down at the floor.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! “everyone stand back...” the police man once again screached.
“O.M.G”
“oh my god,a dead body”
“can it be”
“Close youre eyes kids” the woman behind me wearily said to her three chilren.
“Mummy he's asleep isn’t he? Mummy” the litle girl said