As the wind roared wildly, Charlie was darting deeper
into the woods until the trees became tall and dense. This is when he had to
stop; it was impossible to see anything more than a meter away. Lying on the
floor trying to catch his breath, he spotted a tiny creature scuttling towards
him. Finally catching his breath, he spoke calmly.
“Well aren’t you a cutie pie, little man?”
The hedge hog looked intently at him. Charlie,
who had a soft spot for animals, scooped up the creature in his hands. A shocking flash of red shot out of the
hedgie’s eye and Charlie lay dead upon the floor..JPG)
Fantastic writing Tina, lovely complex sentences and a very dangerous hedgehog! Your adjectives and adverbs are also excellent.
ReplyDeleteSuper writing Tina, I would not like to meet the scary hedgehog when I am out walking keep on writing your have used excellent adjectives sorry about the delay in commenting
ReplyDeleteI love youre description of trees and how charlie has a soft spot for annimals maybea includ were charlie is
ReplyDeletenice writing tina!!! but make shure your picture looks more scary thumbs up(it looks more cute than scary)!!!!!! from your friends mayeda and georgeina!!!!
ReplyDeletegood adgectives and semi colon keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteHog Hedge the Hedge hog by Tina
ReplyDeleteAs the wind roared wildly, Charlie was darting deeper into the woods,surrounding the towering manor, until the trees became tall and dense. This is when he had to stop; it was impossible to see anything more than a meter away. Lying on the floor trying to catch his breath, he spotted a tiny creature scuttling towards him.
Finally catching his breath, he spoke calmly.
“Well aren’t you a cutie pie, little man?”
The hedge hog looked intently at him. Charlie, who had a soft spot for animals, scooped up the creature in his hands. A shocking flash of red shot out of the hedgie’s eye and Charlie lay dead and blood sodden upon the floor.
good adverbs and adjectives, I liked the well aren't you a cutie pie., I liked the name of the character being hog hedge,what happens when charlie dies?
ReplyDelete