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Friday 6 September 2013

A Day at the Skate Park by Harry, Jamie and Emmanuel


After school Jamie and Emmanuel were at the skate park in Swanley. An hour later Harry turned up and we all had a game of s.c.o.o.t. it was Jamie’s  set first and his set was a whip rewind it was Harry’s turn to do the whip rewind and he failed it  then it was Emmanuel’s turn and he bailed it. His set was a 180 .... suddenly I heard a crack....

7 comments:

  1. I loved reading this and can't wait to find out what the crack was. I like that you have used some interesting punctuation in your writing to make it more exciting. Next time could you change your middle sentences so you don't use 'it was' 3 times to make it even better?

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  2. Great use of apostrophes for possession boys and well done for remembering capital letters and full stops. Maybe you could add some adjectives next time. (E.g. we all had a great game of super S.C.O.O.T!)

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  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  4. Well done boys I read your story and I thought it was not good but fantastic.by kerry

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  5. I presume someone was hurt? Does set mean a sequence of skates? Let me know next week please. Mrs. Weeks

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  6. Remembering is one of those days when we remember the loving people who risked their life’s fighting for are country. We were the poppies for the people that died who risked their lives for us. We say thank you to those who die as a hero to our country.

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  7. A Day at the Skate Park by Harry, Jamie and Emmanuel





    After school Jamie and Emmanuel were at the skate park in Swanley. An hour later Harry turned up and we all had a game of s.c.o.o.t. this was Jamie’s set first and his set was a whip rewind. Suddenly Harry’s turn to do the whip rewind and he failed it. Finally Emmanuel’s turn arrived and he bailed it! His set was a 180 .... suddenly I heard a crack....

    ReplyDelete

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