Total Pageviews

Friday, 20 September 2013

Jessica


One bright and windy day I was sitting on my bed listening to some music relaxing, my mum and dad went shopping I stayed at home with my older sister. I was a bit board. I was getting changed and a really bright light appeared from the wardrobe. I quickly got all my clothes and run out the door, I went to tell my sister, I know I’m not crazy. I  looked in the wardrobe and got sucked in to a land full of snow...I don’t  know what I should do suddenly I saw someone walking towards me and I panicked, What should I do ...
Posted by at

3 comments:

  1. Unknown21 September 2013 at 02:32

    Well done for using an adverb this week Jessica (quickly)
    Next week read your own work and check you have used commas when you would like your reader to pause.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous21 September 2013 at 11:52

    Hi Jessica,
    What an original idea! I was curious to know what was glowing in the wardrobe. I like the way you left the reader wanting to know more, in my head I have an image of a creature coming towards you, a little like you might find in Narnia.
    Keep writing!
    Miss. T team 100wc

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous3 October 2013 at 02:51

    dear Jessica, I love how you ask questions to the reader but you need to work on your tenses.

    ReplyDelete

Comments can be made by selecting 'anonymous' from the drop down menu. However, please add your name at the end of the comments box as we like to know who our comments come from.

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)