The next day my mum screamed in horror, I came down to
the kitchen and the leftover pudding was alive! Meanwhile I hid in the disgusting
bin. I felt like I was going to die right before my eyes. So I became a man and
went to fight, all of a sudden I saw a custard army who came to help me...
Lovely idea to write it in custard this week Mason! I'm please the custard army turned out to be good and helped you out of the bin.
ReplyDeleteHi Mason, well done for entering this week's 100WC, there were over a thousand entries this time!
ReplyDeleteYou have used some really fabulous descriptive words in your writing; scrumptious, wonderful and dreamy.
Maybe next time, you could read your story to a friend to check that your readers can follow your ideas. I think that you had so many good ideas and you wanted to include them all. Sometimes, focusing on a couple of ideas is enough.
What do you think?
Well done and keep writing. :)
Mrs Tucker (100WC Team) Wirral UK
One dark mysterious night I was having wonderful dreamy custard pudding, however the pudding was boiling hot, it felt like my mouth was on fire but scrumptious at the same time. After I was full up from my desert and couldn’t eat it all.
ReplyDeleteThe next day my mum screamed in horror, I came down to the kitchen and the leftover pudding was alive! Meanwhile I hid in the disgusting bin. I felt like I was going to die right before my eyes. So I became a man and went to fight, all of a sudden I saw a custard army who came to help me...