One snowy Christmas morning a little
boy named Jack was delighted. He asked if he could open his first present. He
ripped the wrapping paper into shreds, at the speed of lightning. He was over
the moon to find that he had got exactly what he wanted. It was a...
.... ZURG and BUZZ LIGHTYEAR. He
bolted upstairs with the toys in his hands. Jack peered under the bed for
batteries. But when he put the batteries in it, it must of had a mind of its
own cause it said “I’m your father...”
What happens next TT.
Great first 100 word challenge boys. Great simile and controlled sentence structure. I like the verbs 'bolted' and 'ripped'
ReplyDeleteNext time try to use more adjectives and adverbs.
Action packed description with an unusual ending. Well done, good use of 100words.
ReplyDeleteWell done boys, a brilliant story
ReplyDeleteMrs W x
brilliant story
ReplyDeletewell done it is a brilliant story
ReplyDeleteawsome
ReplyDeleteI really like your word choice and the way you wrote your story. Come and visit my website at http://caitlin52.edublogs.org/
ReplyDelete