One
warm, sunny afternoon I decided to go to
the circus with my family in Goddington Park. I quickly ran to the front of the
line and in front of me I saw my friend Kelly there. Six mins later i got in to
the circus and there was a man dressed up as a clown. Then he asked my little
sister douse she want a pie and she said yes and suddenly she put it in my face
then everybody there joined in. IT WAS A DASASTER I SHOUTED. Everyone was
cuverd in custard. I went home...
Well done Kerry, good word choices in (quickly and suddenly) Next time make sure you run a spell check before publishing your work. Also which punctuation do you need to add in?
ReplyDeleteIs it a , or a ! From kerry
ReplyDeleteKerry it sounds like the little sister in your story got fooled by one of the oldest clown tricks in the book - she should have said no! Too bad the circus turned out to be a disaster. Just keep an eye out for spelling, and then your story will be even more fun to read!
ReplyDeleteKerry I agree as i think you should do a grammer and punctuation check next time
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteOne warm, sunny afternoon I decided to go to the circus with my family in Goddington Park. I quickly ran to the front of the line and in front of me I saw my friend Kelly there. Six mins later i got in to the circus and there was a man dressed up as a clown. Then he asked my little sister douse she want a pie and she said yes and suddenly she put it in my face then everybody there joined in. IT WAS A DASASTER I SHOUTED. Everyone was cuverd in custard. I went home...