One day I went to get a toy for my
brother’s birthday, ’’he was 8 years old, when I gave the toy to him, when I
put the batteries in it suddenly, KABOOM!!! The toy burst out of the box. When I kicked it in the head
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3 sentences isn't enough James.
ReplyDeleteNext time you must reach your 100 words. Also you must start your ideas in different ways. You have used 'when I' three times.